Today was a Zach-filled day. During every meeting there is a time called "promotions" where anyone can talk about upcoming events. I talked about our Jesus Seminar on the Road, October 18-19 as well as a seminar coming up September 14th called "Suicide and Its Aftermath." In talking about this event I mentioned losing Zach to suicide in the summer of 2012 and the grief and shame of that. I mentioned that the Session was putting on this seminar as their own response to an event that has affected everyone. Not just Zach's suicide, but since Zach's death I now know many who have lost friends, relatives, siblings, spouses, children, and parents and it needs to be discussed. In many ways, the congregation is doing this to minister to me, and to help me minister, whether I attend it or not.
I am not sure at this point if I will be able to attend. It is a little close to home. Either way, I am grateful to the congregation for hosting it and they know that. They are allowing me the freedom to attend or not attend. I will decide when the time comes.
Then early this evening I watched Zach's car drive out of the driveway. We were planning on giving it and the truck away to charity and I found someone who needed a car and the truck, too. I gave them to this person instead. I am glad these vehicles will be doing something productive. They have been sitting and succumbing to the Second Law of Thermodynamics for some time now and need some energy put into their systems if you know what I mean.
As the car went up the driveway, I thought of my boy and wished he could have driven a nicer car.
More than anything I wish he was still here to drive the one he had.
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